4 May

So tell me if I’m wrong here…I really need advice on this.

This morning as Loverboy was leaving for work, he said we should head to a dinner and movie tonight. I agreed, and that was that. Or so I thought.

He called me during his lunch break, asked how my day was, etc etc. this is normal. He then said that he would call me after work. Also normal.

So I had a pretty shitty afternoon/evening. I won’t lie about that. What could go wrong, did. But I was buoyed by the fact that I was going to dinner and a movie, for my birthday no less. He has his kids on my actual birthday a few days from now, so we talked about tonight. Following so far?

So at six I start getting ready. Hair done, makeup done, and I wait. And wait. At 730 I send him a text, asking if we still have plans, no response. Something else happened, and my night got even shittier. Still no Loverboy. He FINALLY called me at 830. I asked if we were still getting together, he said no, and I said ‘OK’. Then shit got interesting.

Now I will admit that I was already on the verge of tears when he called. Not because he stood me up, but because of the other shitty news I got. When he said he was going to go to his brothers instead, I told him to have a good evening and hung up the phone. A good move on my part? Probably not. But I wasn’t going to let him hear me cry.

He called me twenty minutes later on the defensive. What’s your problem? You have no right to be mad at me. I don’t remember making plans with you. You get mad at me if you don’t hear from me one day, and you know what Esme? I don’t need this shit in my life. I just don’t.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. What the fuck is going on here?? My response:

Let me lay it on the line for you, L. You made plans with me this morning, and you stood me up. Am I necessarily upset with you? Some. But I’m more upset that I actually did my hair and makeup and WAITED AROUND for you instead of doing other shit. So therefore I am more mad at myself. And another thing, I don’t get mad if I don’t hear from you. There are many days that we don’t communicate until you call me before you head to bed. So that argument is invalid. And lastly, if you decide you want to see your brother instead of me (which is where he went tonight), I’m OK with that. Family is number one, most important thing there is. I get that I rank below your family. I get that I rank below your kids. And I should. But don’t sit and tell me that I’m doing shit that ‘you don’t need’ in your life.

There was a long stretch of silence.

Listen, L. I’m sorry if you think I’m mad at you. I’m sorry if you think that I have to hear from you every night, and you feel obligated to call. You know when this would have been a good time to have this discussion? When you first started feeling this way. Not tonight.

Loverboy thought of what I said, and then threw out some other shit I can’t remember. He was on the defensive, and he was wanting to get it all out there.

He eventually asked if he called me tomorrow, and I remarked that I may be nursing a hangover.

L: You’re drinking?
E: Yep. (I’m not a big drinker)
L: Are you sure thats a good idea?
E: I don’t give a shit if it is or not. Fuck it, right?
L: I’m going to call you when I’m at my brothers. I may stop in to check on you.
E: Because you feel guilty? Don’t bother. Enjoy your brother’s house.
L: I’m serious.
E: Sure you are. Have fun.

I hung up. I just got a text asking if I felt better because he is at his brothers. I haven’t answered. I guess I am pissed off about being stood up. For my BIRTHDAY.


2 Responses to “Umm…hmmm…”

  1. My Dating Hangovers May 5, 2012 at 3:21 am #

    What the hell just happened here, because that little outburst of his screams “some other issues”. Let’s see here- he made plans and acted like he didn’t so you either are confused or he’s got selective amnesia. The not needing “this shit” is alluding to something else, not your disappointment over not going out, so unless you left something out of your conversation with him earlier, I don’t get it.

    I applaud you for setting the record straight because I probably would have done something immature like oh… Ignore him until the next day. What’s confusing even more is that he has this “fuck you” tone and moments later, wants to check on you.

    Let it rest for tonight and see how he acts tomorrow. Something else is bothering him; he either had an even shittier day than you did or is fesering about one of your recent spats.

    Sorry to hear this girl… Sit back and observe.

    • Esme May 5, 2012 at 1:51 pm #

      Read the new post…I’m not even sure what happened!

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