This Either Got Messy…Or Ended

26 Dec

First off, Merry belated Christmas to all of my girls out there!  I hope it indeed was a merry fucking Christmas, and you were surrounded by family and friends.  And I hope you made many wonderful memories.

Alright, back on track here hookers…if you remember, I mentioned that Ex-BF gave me three tickets to a hockey game, and also invited himself to go along.  We went.  It was fun/interesting.  Let me elaborate.

He drove, which was cool, and got us there in plenty of time to look around, which my kids loved. Before we sat down, we stood in line and got some grub.  I ordered basically a whole dinner for my kids, knowing full well it was going to be ass-expensive, and being perfectly content paying for it.  While I was handing said food to my children, he paid for the whole damn meal, and even bought us drinks.  I kept trying to give him money to cover my share, and he wouldn’t accept it.  I said thank you, but felt a little uncomfortable.  Not sure why, I just did.

Throughout the game, Ex-BF would leave and come back with food or drinks.  Very uncharacteristic for him, not usually so generous.  I always thanked him-told him he didn’t have to do it, etc.  He always said ‘I know’.  Now…I was baffled.

Why the hell is he being so nice???  No no no…none of this rule-changing again…no mind-fucking here!!!  Go back to the way it was!!!!  This is bad…

By the end of the game I think he realized what he was doing, and what vibes he was throwing off.  He became very quiet, didn’t talk much, didn’t even look at me much.  During the drive home I finally asked him if he was OK, if he felt awkward, why was he so quiet?  Was it my kids?

No, Esme, you’re kids are great, they really are.  I had a great time with them.  You just need to know that I really don’t do feelings…

FUCK!!!

Haven’t heard from him since, except for a ‘Merry Christmas’ text.  So apparently he needs time to think I guess?  Who fucking knows.  What the fuck ever.  What the fuck is up with men anyways?  Granted, I can be a really really big runner when feelings get involved, but I’m not even sure we have seen each other enough?  I will say, though, that the holidays are a really tough time to try and start anything, so if he comes around, great.  If not, better I know now then after I, myself, become attached.

*men*make*me*want*to*beat*my*head*against*the*wall*

Love, Esme

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2 Responses to “This Either Got Messy…Or Ended”

  1. Simmarah December 28, 2010 at 11:38 pm #

    Guys and their fucking feelings. DO THEY EVER GROW UP?
    Nope!

    • Esme December 29, 2010 at 12:46 pm #

      Amen Sister. No they don’t! Once again…the proof that men are WAY more emotional then women…

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