The Last Straw…

31 Aug

Dear 24 year-old Horndog,

OK, I have had it.  Yes, we went out on a date.  I met you during the academy.  You found out I was single, and you asked me out for dinner and drinks.  I thought you were MUCH closer to my age (you definitely look much closer to my age), so I said yes.  I did have a good time, but when I found out you were seven (7) years younger then me, I informed you I was uncomfortable with it.  I told you I am not alright with our age difference.  Almost different generations.  I thought I was clear.  Nothing intimate happened between us, I thanked you for the fun time, and I walked away.

You, apparently, did not take the hint.

I have received numerous text messages from you asking when we can go out again.  I keep politely turning you down.  The last straw, however, was the other night when I received the following text messages. All after midnight.   And I quote:

You:   Hey.  Just wondering what you are doing.

Me:  I am in bed sleeping.

You:  How about I come do you.  I have a boner.

Me:  Pass

Bear with me here.  Some rules when trying to get into bed with a woman.

1. Never, ever, use the word ‘boner’.  The only ones who do are, well, 24 year-olds.

2. Never ask a woman if you can ‘do her’.  Big no-no.

3. Take the damn hint…I don’t want to see you, I don’t want to date you, and I don’t want to fuck you.

Pass.

Love, Esme

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